Constant Reflections
by tsunami1156
Summary: Simple thoughts between characters on various things. Most recent: Dr. Gensai.
1. Nightmare

**Disclaimer: I do not own Rurouni Kenshin.**

**These are a series of short drabbles from one character's perspective. Many of them will center around Kenshin and Kaoru, but mostly it will just depend on where my thoughts take me.**

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This is very short, but I was just thinking about it because I was bored. I may write more short thoughts between characters, so please review and let me know what you think.

Have you parents ever told you stories of creatures that would come after you if you misbehaved? I know mine did. They told me tales to make sure that I went to bed, cleaned my room, did chores…whatever needed to be done. I remember one time that my father told me about an assassin because I didn't want to help with the laundry. I was five.

"Kaoru-chan, if you don't help your okaa-san with the laundry, do you know what will happen?" he said. I looked at him with stubborn eyes and shook my head. Kneeling down next to me he continued, "The Hitokiri Battousai will come get you. He's an evil man with fire as his hair, gold eyes that glow in the dark, and a sword that is stained with blood. Now, I certainly don't want him to find you, but if you keep refusing to do laundry, then…" I shrieked and hurried over to okaa-san. I never tried to get out of doing laundry again. But now here I am. Living with the very creature of my nightmares.

My father could not have been more wrong. It was true that he has red hair, golden eyes, and a sword. But his hair is beautiful, his eyes are caring, and his sword is my protection. It makes me wonder how many children see him and run away in fright, thinking all sorts of things about the man I love. They don't see what I see, and I know that they never will. It's not easy to change people's minds. But my mind will be forever changed by the man who used to haunt my dreams.

And the most ironic thing about it is…_he_ does my laundry.


	2. Change

**Disclaimer: I do not own Rurouni Kenshin.**

**Perspective: Kenshin (obviously haha)**

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Throughout my life I have met so many different people. I have met politicians who bask in their money, drowning in their greed. I have met families suffering from poverty but trying their best to survive. I have met women who keep waiting for their husbands to come back from the war, despite the fact that they never will. I have met children roaming the streets, trying their hands at pickpocketing in a fruitless attempt to make it in the world. I have met samurai who have lost their honor after being forced to throw away their sword.

I sold my soul when I joined the Ishin Shishi when I was 14. I thought that I would be helping all of the people who were suffering under the oppression of the government. I allowed myself to be controlled because my young mind couldn't understand what my master tried to tell me. But my ideals held strong throughout all of the chaos and the violence of the revolution. Although I killed, I never did it for my own gain. It was all in order to create a better world for those suffering around me.

I would be a liar if I said that my work didn't help create a better government for Japan, but I would be a fool if I said that it did all that I hoped for. Some people have benefited from the war, but far too many people are still living in poverty. Was it worth it? I don't know. Would I go through it all again? I don't know.

But I do know that there are _some_ things I would never want to change—some things I would never want to miss. Or should I say some_one_?


	3. First Impressions

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Rurouni Kenshin.

Here's another one from Megumi's point of view. I still have a lot of ideas, and I've been slowly trying to work out a longer story in my head that would branch off of these drabbles. I'm still trying to get some direction, so please review and give me any ideas that you come up with!

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They say not to judge a book by its cover, and no one proves this better than Himura Kenshin. When I first saw Ken-san, I found him sitting in a gambling hall with another roguish man. He had a sword by his side, which was why I immediately ran up to him for help. He was always so willing to help.

After he saved me, I was able to really observe him. I noticed that he was a handsome, charming man. He was loved by a young woman, idolized by a young boy, and trusted by a young man. The four of them created an unbreakable family, and he was the piece that held them all together. It was his irresistible charm and that gentle smile of his that won me over. It didn't matter what was going on in his life, he always kept that smile. There were some days that it didn't really reach his eyes, but he always tried to make sure that no one worried about him. Sometimes I would look at him smiling across the table and laughing with everyone. It was a hollow, empty laugh. He tried to fool us so that we wouldn't worry, and he did a good job at it. But there were times that he let his mask slip a little too much, and I could see all the hurt that he kept bottled up inside. It would only last a moment, but it was enough for me to see.

When I found out that he was the Battousai, I couldn't believe it. This man? This man who looks so weak? I didn't realize at the time just how strong he was. He wasn't just physically strong but mentally as well. How many people could bear to keep living after all that he has gone through? His pain, like his smile, never ends.

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And thank you for the reviews so far! I love the encouragement, and I will take your ideas to heart.


	4. How It Should've Been

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Rurouni Kenshin.

Here's more thoughts from Kaoru. I wrote this a loooong time ago, so hopefully it is still okay.

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I've watched Kenshin closely everyday since I've met him. I've watched him interact with other people, watched him hide his darkest secrets, and watched him put on a smile and pretend that everything is alright. And it's always interesting seeing how other people react when they meet him. Some people find out who he is and accept it. They praise him for his efforts during the war—for all that he has done for Japan. They make him out to be a hero. Those people always put a smile on my face. No matter what Kenshin thinks of himself, it's nice to know that people are grateful for all the trouble that he went through to help them.

But those people are few. Most people discover his identity and shrink back in fright. They're suddenly angry. No matter what their previous behavior was towards him, whether they idolized him or not, they are quickly hateful of his whole being. They ignore all that he has done for our country. They ignore all of his good intentions. And most of all, they ignore who he has become. "He's a demon," they say. "He should be punished for all of the people he has killed." If only they knew. He is punished. Everyday, he lives on, trying to make up for his so-called 'crimes.' It shouldn't be like this. There shouldn't be people coming after him, people wanting him dead. They shouldn't be hating him. Parents shouldn't be telling their children of the demon of Kyoto; he doesn't deserve to be a child's nightmare. Instead, he should be honored as a hero. He should be decorated as a brave soldier. People should be shouting praises and laying flowers at his feet.

There are some in the government who wished to praise him and offered him a top-ranking position. But the number of people who cower at his name greatly outnumber those who understand the honor that he so justly deserves. It makes me tremble sometimes when I think about how unfair it is. But I cannot imagine how he must feel. He already has to bear all the pain of the people he has killed. Then these people make him bear their pain as well. The pain of the living, as well as the pain of the dead. And I just think to myself, it's just not how it should have been.


	5. Women

Disclaimer: I do not own Rurouni Kenshin

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Rurouni Kenshin.

Here are some short thoughts from Saito. I tried to still keep him in character!

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She's screaming at me again. Why is it that every time I show up on their doorstep, this woman is yelling at me? I haven't even said anything yet. I could tell, however, that the Battousai was not home, so my visit to the dojo was somewhat pointless. But I stood there anyway watching this woman yelling furiously at me. Her words were going right through me. Why did the Battousai find this one so appealing?

As I stood there, I realized that she reminded me of someone, and it was then that I realized another thing that the Battousai and I had in common—our women.

As an ex-captain of the Shinsengumi and now police officer, I needed a woman who would be able to handle my lifestyle. Throughout the revolution, I had met many women who, although quite pleasing, were idiots. They were terrified of the war and could not comprehend its purpose. They were boring, self-centered, and pathetic. It wasn't until later that I met Tokio. She wasn't careless like all of the other women. She listened to me when I gave her instructions yet remained strong-willed. She wouldn't follow my every order and usually demanded an explanation for them. And although she does not like my current position, she accepts fighting as part of the package. She is quite an amazing woman.

After all, a strong swordsman needs a strong woman by his side to create a balance. And the Battousai is no exception. He requires a woman who is just as ignorant and stubborn as he is. And standing in front of her now, I finally see what he sees in her. She's just like Tokio.

I smirk as I watch her still yelling at me and turn to walk away. I hear her slam the door, and I smile. She had no idea what I was thinking about, but if only she knew.

Yes, she and Tokio would get definitely get along.


	6. Still A Kid

Disclaimer: I do not own Rurouni Kenshin.

Here's one from Yahiko's point of view finally.

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**Still A Kid**

Everyone calls me a kid, but sometimes I swear that I'm more mature than everyone else. Obviously I know that I'm probably not, but it's _those_ times that I feel like the only adult around here.

First, there's Kaoru. Whenever I call her ugly, she starts throwing things at me. Her temper always gets the best of her…not that I'm really any better. But she's the assistant master, so she _should_ be the example. If I do anything wrong, it's immediately, "That's another 5,000 swings, Yahiko! That'll teach you to show your master the proper respect!" Or she'll say something about being the "rose of kenjutsu." And her cooking—don't even get me started.

Then there's Sanoske. He's always coming around for a free lunch when he's not at the Akabeko adding to his so-called tab. He'll just walk into the dojo with a fishbone in his mouth, looking very hungover and having lost money from gambling the night before. The only times he wins are when he manages to drag Kenshin with him. I guess the Hiten-Mitsurugi-ryu must have a dice technique or something.

Speaking of which, Kenshin isn't exactly the mature role model either. He always shuts himself up so that we have no idea what he's thinking. And he'll do everything that Kaoru tells him to, even when she asks him to pick up a million things at the market. Then he always plays dumb, acting naive and like he doesn't know what's going on, but I can tell that it's all an act. I mean, he was the Hitokiri Battousai, so he's no idiot. Kaoru usually doesn't notice though. Then again, usually it's when Megumi is hitting on him, so Kaoru's distracted already.

Megumi never takes anything seriously. She comes over just to flirt with Kenshin, which throws Kaoru over the edge. She's always had a thing for the redhead, but it's obvious that she likes Sanoske, too, by the way they bicker all the time. I don't know how she's a doctor sometimes.

See, everyone thinks I'm just a little kid and that I don't notice anything. But I think I've noticed more than they could imagine. And it's through all of this that I've come to realize how much I appreciate all of them. Kaoru, even though she can be a pain, has the biggest heart. She's always taken care of me, and I look to her as an older sister. And Sanoske, even though he's pretty reckless and not very responsible, he's always true to his word. He'd never let anything happen to us. Megumi has saved my life more times than I can count. Actually, she's saved _all_ of our lives, and there's no doctor I would trust more.

And then there's Kenshin. He's my role-model, even though he hides behind a mask and that smile that he plasters on his face, even though he has more dark secrets than the everyone in the world combined, and even though he always tries to carry everything on his own shoulders. It's all of that that makes him the greatest man I've ever known.

After being adopted into this strange family, I have been so happy. I lost my parents when I was younger, and I never imagined I could have such a family again. Sure, it isn't very conventional, but I wouldn't trade it for the world. And when I finally _am_ no longer a kid, it will be them that I will owe for making me a man.

Of course, even if I had grey hair, I think they'll _still_ call me "Yahiko-CHAN."


	7. Tab

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Rurouni Kenshin.

This one is actually about Tae and Sano. I thought it might be nice to have a reflection about some of the other characters from the series. I think everyone is pretty familiar with Sano's...ahem, tab at the Akabeko. No one ever really writes much about Tae, but I think she's quite an entertaining character. I hope you enjoy the story, though it's short. More to come...if you have any ideas, please let me know!

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He didn't pay the bill_…again_. Honestly, I don't know if he thinks that punching drunkards out of my restaurant makes up for the meals he steals from me or if he really plans on paying me back after having a winning streak in gambling. Of course, I know that the latter will never happen because as soon as the idiot wins any money he immediately spends it on sake. He'll never learn, I swear.

I always see him come into the Akabeko, and I debate with myself furiously over whether to serve him or not. But I can't just _refuse_ a customer when it's possible he may come up with the money one day. A part of my mind tells me that that'll be the day Kenshin professes his undying love for Megumi…as in, it will never happen. That cunning fox drives me crazy sometimes when I watch her flirt outrageously with the handsome redhead. Kaoru always gets so fluttered, and they cause chaos in my restaurant every time they're together. I love them both dearly, but that group is by far the strangest friends I have ever known. Of course, _they_ actually pay their bill.

But they're all like family to me. Perhaps that is why I care for them so much. And maybe that's why I let that gangster come in and get a free meal. I put on a huge display in front of the other customers, chasing him out of the restaurant with a broom and shrieking at him to bring me the money to pay his ever-lengthening tab. If I didn't do that, then other customers would probably stop paying their bills, too.

So do I really expect him to pay? Does it really bother me that he never will? I'm honestly not sure. I know that he _is_ paying me back in his own little way though. It may not be monetary means, but the little chores he does for me, like fixing the roof or walking Tsubame home, are his way of repayment.

Besides, I really would miss him. It gives me the chance to unleash my anger. Nothing I say or scream ever seems to faze him anyway…I think he's been hit one too many times in the head. Baka!


	8. Perfect Match

**Disclaimer: I do not own Rurouni Kenshin.**

**This is a short about Dr. Gensai's thoughts. Please enjoy! And if you have any suggestions for further musings, please let me know!**

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I've known Kaoru ever since she was a little girl. I watched as she used to laugh and giggle as she ran around the dojo with her father, I watched as she used to clumsily try to duplicate her mother's makeup, I watched as she grew more and more like her father with every passing day, and I watched as she lost her last living relative, leaving her to fend for herself as a newly-independent young woman. Kaoru was never weak, and she always stood up for what was right. She wasn't one to fall into tears at the first sign of struggle, a trait she must have acquired from her late father. Of course, even her mother was a strong woman.

Training in kenjutsu was a way for Kaoru to strengthen her body and mind, and it was an outlet for all of the pain that she had to endure growing up. Being without a mother at such a pivotal point in her life was never easy, and Koshijiro frequently came by the clinic for advice, hoping that I could offer some after bringing up a daughter of my own. However, the subject that came up the most in our discussions was the matter of Kaoru's future husband. She was still young and had plenty of time, but it quickly became apparent, after Kaoru brushed aside many fine young men, that she was going to be difficult to please. It was very important to both Koshijiro and myself that Kaoru married a man who met all of our expectations. He had to be physically strong, intelligent, kind, and most importantly, completely devoted to her. Naturally, Kaoru, in turn, had to be in love with him. For the longest time, I doubted that any man would meet her standards, and I worried every day what would become of a single woman running a kenjutsu dojo after I passed on and could not longer look after her.

My fears were finally put to rest in the form of a mysterious red-haired stranger. When I was called to attend to Kaoru's shoulder, I was surprised to see that it had already been capably taken care of by the time I arrived at the dojo. And, not only that, but there was a delicious stew being cooked that I knew had not resulted from Kaoru's culinary…expertise. While the stranger upon first glance looked to be a gentle, innocent young man no older than Kaoru herself, upon closer inspection, I was able to see the tiredness that lingered on his youthful face and the fluidity with which he moved that spoke of a skilled and seasoned warrior. Surprisingly enough, the sword by his side did not worry me but rather gave me hope that perhaps this young man would be able to whisk Kaoru away. It was easy for me to see how infatuated Kaoru was with a man whom she had known less than 24 hours already.

When I finally discovered the redhead's identity, I was shocked. He did not appear to be 28 years old, and he certainly didn't seem like a malicious assassin. Of course, the true nature of Hitokiri Battousai is unknown, as only the legends are really spoken of. He had already saved Kaoru's life twice, and I felt that I had no reason not to trust the man. It didn't take long for me to realize that he was her perfect match. Kaoru's innocence balanced out his guilt-ridden past, and his experience made up for Kaoru's naivety. They were two halves that made a whole.

I hope that Koshijiro is not offended that I allowed this love to blossom, but I'm sure that if he were around, he would agree that there was truly no one more worthy of Kaoru's love than Himura Kenshin.


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